I haven’t been able to get you off my mind since your mom first told me.
I haven’t forgotten the first time I heard your heartbeat.
I haven’t stopped thinking about what it will be like to hold you,
to know you, to watch you grow into a man.
Holy crap, I’m scared.
I’m scared I won’t know how to love you.
I’m scared my own broken past will come back to haunt you. I’m scared I won’t know how to raise you.
I’m scared to let you down.
But either way, I’m proud.
I’m proud to be your Dad.
I’m proud of who you are becoming. And although I’m not certain I’ll be the best Father, I believe you’ll make a tremendous son.
Night and Day, I pray for you.
As I prepare to meet the little version of you,
I choose to see the man inside you.
Because that’s what God intends for you; to become a man.
You have no idea the amazing things God has for you.
As this little life of yours works its way into the world,
you’ll get beat up, knocked down, and scarred.
You’ll come to realize that life is hard.
But you’re a Rose.
You’re a masterpiece designed by the hands of God
You’re stronger than most, simply because of who your Daddy is.
You are not who they say you are, you are who He says you are
I hope I can just teach you to be resilient. And
as you cross over from boyhood to manhood, I’ll be present.
I can’t wait to meet you, son.
My heart was racing the day I learned you were real.
Tears are forming as I write this, still.
The thought of raising a little dude makes my chest pound.
So I just thank God that your mom will be around.
One day I’ll be changing your diaper.
The next I’ll be watching you graduate.
I assume that’s God’s plan.
But what if He has other ideas?
Am I just seeing all this through Rose colored lenses?
No matter what happens next,
I want you to know I love you exactly as you are.
Just you,
for being you.
Whatever life brings your way,
you won’t have to walk alone.
And if, by chance you read this someday,
I want you to know that Jesus is the only way.
He’s the one person worth clinging to.
I hope you’ll choose to honor God.
He’s the only perfect father
He’s the real Rose…of Sharon, and the Lily of the Valley.
He gave His all for you
And you were His child before you are mine.
Can’t wait to meet you, little guy.